Sunday, May 10, 2015

motherhood to me.

Motherhood is harder than I thought it would be. Like wayyyy harder. It's also more wonderful. When it's raining outside on a beautiful Saturday morning and I get to take my kids out on the porch to smell the air and watch the dark sky, motherhood is so wonderful.  

And it's hard when you're handed things you weren't expecting. Like sweet babies with special needs, and sweet babies with illnesses, and moments of crippling grief. Motherhood brings me to my knees and has broken my heart in half more than once. 

Motherhood has wrecked me. But, at the same time, NOTHING in my life has ever pushed me to be MORE, like motherhood has. I am grateful its not easy. I am grateful it's not what I expected. I am grateful for everything I am becoming in the process of raising my little crew. 

I am grateful for the way they smell when you nuzzle your face into that crevice underneath their chin. I am grateful for little feet in footy pajamas and little words said incorrectly. I am grateful for the way I am completely covered, head to toe, in children the moment I sit down. I am grateful for blonde pig tails, and hands holding tight to mine, and "mommy will you hold me?" as I wipe the counter after breakfast. I am grateful to be needed, cherished, and forgiven by my children time and time again. 

I am so grateful for the chance to try.

Happy Mother's Day, 2015

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thank you for your shout outs!